Sunday, October 31, 2010

Happy Halloween...if there is such a thing!

Turner's "Bumpkin" {on left} Mr. Munki {in the middle} Trev's "Plumpkin" {on right}

Well...well...well.  Here we are.  It is Great Hallow's Eve; {not my idea of a Holiday} and not my favorite night.  Don't get me wrong, I don't want to rain on any one's parade.  If you like creepy, spooky, goblins, ghouls, smashed pumpkins, spending money on costumes and candy, kids gone wild and collecting more candy than any one human should consume in an entire year - then hey...knock yourself out!

I loved Halloween when I was a kid.  My mom use to make our costumes.  We would make hot apple cider and caramel apples.  We attended safe and sane neighborhood Halloween Parties and dawned the doorsteps of Grandparent's dressed in our costumes.  

Then, I had kids of my own.  Taylor was my first and I made him an adorable lil Devil costume {much to the dismay of my Grandmother}.  We took him out with friends in our neighborhood and all was fine and dandy.  That was 20 years ago.  Things then were still pretty harmless.  

As the years passed and Trenton came along, Taylor got older and was VERY afraid of the displays at the grocery store.  He hated going out in public before Halloween and did not really even want to trick-or-treat.  We did the fun night at our church and had a ball.  

The Halloween before he turned 8 years old he came to me and told me he wanted to dress up as "Pastor Dan" our Church's Pastor.  He knelt in our basement, which was converted to my in-home daycare and asked me to pray with him.  He told me he wanted to ask Jesus into his heart to live there FOREVER!  He had his Veggie Tales Tie, his Bible and his nice "church clothes".  We prayed together and then called up Pastor Dan to share the news!

Dressed like a little man, he went from door to door, ever so reluctantly as we came to homes that were all "spooooky".  He knocked on the door and then asked the person with the candy bowl "Do YOU have the love of Jesus in YOUR heart?"  When they looked at him stunned holding their bowl they stopped to think and then answer.  Most said "Why yes!"  He would then shake their hand, smile and say "Great!  God Bless You!  I just asked Jesus into my heart! Have a Great Halloween!"  Spinning on his heel, anxious to get to the next home...he didn't even take the candy!  He was on fire for the Lord and he was gonna tell the whole neighborhood!

We thought that one day, he would grow up to be a Pastor.  He has such a caring heart, so feeling, so loving.  He was baptized a month later at our church's Thanksgiving Feast.  

Fast forward 11 years.  He has battled drug and alcohol addiction for 5 agonizing years.  Left with no answers as to "why" or "where we went wrong".  The pain and heartache is indescribable.  I pray we are on the other side now...but you never know.

He has been sober now 90 days today!  Praise God.  I am not sure how my life would have changed if on that night I could have seen into the future and had known what a painful road we would have to travel down to reach his 20th birthday.  One never knows.  That is the irony of this "life".

So, tonight in an effort to allow my last 2 boys to "make a memory" I will drag my sick self {been battling sinus problems and allergies for a month} out to collect the candy with my kids.  We will have one Skeleton and one Darth Vader.  We will go to our church where they have planned a super evening of fun for the kids and families.  

Tomorrow I will sort the candy, hide the candy and battle with my already very high spirited boys over why candy is not an appropriate breakfast food.  Everyone has their favorites - Daddy loves 3 Musketeers and Snickers, mine is peanut M&M's, Reese's and Almond Joy.  Trenton loves Reese's and SOUR stuff.  Turner loves suckers and skittles.  Trevan loves push pops.  Taylor...well he loves it all.  He has never been picky. 

The boys will make a bag for their big brother.  They love him so.  Stace and Trenton are there visiting him now in his rehab.  He will complete that program on November 3rd and then go to a transitional home.  He wants to come home, but I don't feel we are all ready - yet.  

One day at a time.  That is all we can handle.


 Taylor on Halloween 10 year ago.  
He ironically dressed as a skateboarder.  
Little did we know that 7 years later he would be involved in a skateboarding accident that would change our lives forever...leaving him with a brain injury.

Cherish each day...