Thursday, January 28, 2010

Will there be a new chapter?


When we become parents there are no guarantees.  Such is life.  I am praying that there will be a new chapter in our lives as Taylor hits a rock bottom.  It is not his first rock bottom and may not be his last - but I can pray that it is.

I pray that the new chapter that we will embark upon will be one of healing and success.  This is always the hope of a parent.  We pray that we do the best job that we can and that our kids end up successful.  We have our hopes and dreams for their lives.  Whatever that may look like.  

Each person has a different yardstick in which they gauge success.  For one child it may be simply graduating high school and finding a career that they are suited for, shaped for and that they will be gainfully employed and happy.  A success.  For another child it may mean a scholarship to a great college, graduating with a degree and doing something they love as their lifelong career.  A success.  For another it may simply be overcoming drug and alcohol addiction and learning to live with mental illness and a brain injury, then getting a stable job and making ends meet.  A success.

I am not here to judge my children, but am here to guide them and support them the best I know how.  I am blessed that the Lord is placing people in our path that care to lend an ear, send a caring email and let us know that they are not criticizing our choices but are helping us along with prayer and support.

I can't say that I am necessary the happiest that I have ever been.  But I do have a good life.  I am learning to live simply so that we can simply live. 

I appreciate people and their differences more today than I ever have.  I appreciate simple things like a friend buying me a mega pack of toilet paper.  I enjoy a simple cup of coffee and a sinful treat that is not on my diet.  I have learned who in my life drains me and who energizes my inner soul.  

I know that I am allowed to break down, stumble and fall.  I also know that I have awesome friends and family that I can call on to help me up and set me back on my path.  When all else fails and I feel like I can't go on, the Lord is here to carry me in the palm of His mighty hand.  For that I am grateful - that is my guarantee.  The only guarantee in life.

That is all I need.